{"id":38200,"date":"2019-11-15T14:30:06","date_gmt":"2019-11-15T22:30:06","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/?p=38200"},"modified":"2019-11-16T07:33:44","modified_gmt":"2019-11-16T15:33:44","slug":"friday-fun-courtesy-of-the-nunes-jordan-comedy-team","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/2019\/11\/15\/friday-fun-courtesy-of-the-nunes-jordan-comedy-team\/","title":{"rendered":"Friday Fun: Courtesy of &#8220;The Nunes\u2013Jordan Comedy Team&#8221;"},"content":{"rendered":"<p><em>[Editor&#8217;s Note: At least it&#8217;s still Friday.\u00a0 The Impeachment Hearings are just to riveting for me to resist, but take a chunk of time.\u00a0 I think Speaker Pelosi timed this extremely well, and Chairman Schiff is doing a stellar job.]<\/em><\/p>\n<p>Apparently the Rethuglicans were worried that <strong><em>Devin Nunes<\/em><\/strong>, ranking member of the House Intelligence Committee holding this week&#8217;s critical Impeachment Hearings, was not up to the task of making the GOP look like babbling idiots \u2013 so they moved <strong><em>Gym Jordan<\/em><\/strong> over as reinforcement. Both Devin and Gym did a stellar job in making republicans look like fools.<\/p>\n<p>My worst fears were confirmed when I turned on the TV for the opening statements, and this greeted my eyes:<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Head_Schiff_Impeachment.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-38201\" src=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Head_Schiff_Impeachment.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"424\" height=\"236\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Head_Schiff_Impeachment.jpg 424w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Head_Schiff_Impeachment-300x167.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Head_Schiff_Impeachment-150x83.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 424px) 100vw, 424px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Sure enough, Nunes continued to build his ongoing <a href=\"https:\/\/www.washingtonpost.com\/politics\/2019\/03\/19\/ridiculousness-devin-nunes-suing-devin-nunes-cow-what-it-really-signals\/#comments-wrapper\">lawsuit against an imaginary cow<\/a> all day long<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Costume_Impeachment_OPT.gif\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-38185\" src=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Nunes_Cow-Costume_Impeachment_OPT.gif\" alt=\"\" width=\"304\" height=\"200\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>At first I thought they must have had some beginner doing the Closed Caption when Nunes spoke <span style=\"display: inline !important; float: none; background-color: #ffffff; color: #333333; cursor: text; font-family: Georgia,'Times New Roman','Bitstream Charter',Times,serif; font-size: 16px; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; letter-spacing: normal; orphans: 2; text-align: left; text-decoration: none; text-indent: 0px; text-transform: none; -webkit-text-stroke-width: 0px; white-space: normal; word-spacing: 0px;\">because it <\/span>was so rambling.\u00a0 But later, after reading viewers&#8217; comments, I realized the captioning was perfect. It captured his <em>udderly<\/em> (that&#8217;s my only bovine pun for the day) bizarre babbling.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Can anyone help me make sense of *anything* Devin Nunes has said today?<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ImpeachmentHearings?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#ImpeachmentHearings<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/LeNLn6kenf\">pic.twitter.com\/LeNLn6kenf<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; chris evans (@notcapnamerica) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/notcapnamerica\/status\/1194674688137539590?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>One Tweet identified an anatomic concern for Nunes&#8217; ability to breathe \u2013 but maybe it interfered with his speech, too.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">I don&#39;t know how Devin Nunes can breathe with his head so far up Trump&#39;s ass. <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ImpeachmentHearings?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#ImpeachmentHearings<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Jordan Ross Schindler (@jordanrosstv) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/jordanrosstv\/status\/1194673525648318464?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>To be fair, comparing Chairman Schiff&#8217;s legal skills against Nunes isn&#8217;t really a fair fight.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Adam Schiff graduated from Harvard Law School.<\/p>\n<p>Devin Nunes is suing someone pretending to be his cow.<a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ImpeachmentHearings?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#ImpeachmentHearings<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Nick Jack Pappas (@Pappiness) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/Pappiness\/status\/1194672048276168705?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But if Nunes was a lightweight as the designated <em>&#8220;GOP Dolt&#8221;<\/em>, Gym Jordan was the clear heavyweight champ. I&#8217;ve been wrestling with how to approach Jordan&#8217;s performance, so don&#8217;t pin me down to covering all of the lowlights \u2013 but it was clear he was willing to go to the mat for Trump with his disingenuous dissembling.<\/p>\n<p>(Now I don&#8217;t expect anyone to shower me with any accolades, so I&#8217;ll let each of you grapple with whether I hit your favorite Jordan lowlights. If not, please share them in the Comments. <em>[Please Note: I didn&#8217;t say anything about limiting wrestling puns.])<\/em><\/p>\n<p>The first thing that Jordan displayed was his highly excitable temperament \u2013 especially when compared to the calm, fair and even-handed approach of Schiff. Apparently it was obvious to everyone.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">In a perfect world:<\/p>\n<p>Chairman Schiff:  The chair suggests Mr. Jordan, the gentleman from Ohio, switch to decaf.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; James s haley (@Jamesshaley1) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/Jamesshaley1\/status\/1194694466818510849?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Why is Mr. Jordan yelling??  <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/TrumpImpeachment?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#TrumpImpeachment<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/7FYNnEo7zf\">pic.twitter.com\/7FYNnEo7zf<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; j-buggie (@WashingtonCuts) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/WashingtonCuts\/status\/1194687732242616320?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Republican: I yield my screaming time to the gentleman from Ohio.<\/p>\n<p>Jim Jordan: HUROSIBDJWBEHCOVEREDNFBUPHH &#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Ambassador Taylor: Uh, Mr. Jo&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Jordan: HDSEXUALJJAHSSHABUSEHDBATJJDJEJOHIOBRJFJUGUSISTATEGXJISI IT&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Adam Schiff: Your time is up, Mr&#8230;<\/p>\n<p>Jordan: HHSGGGGFH VTT HHI<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Suzanne Davis (@SoozieCuzie) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/SoozieCuzie\/status\/1194695132769112064?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>But I was a bit concerned when Chairman Schiff, yet again, had to ask Jordan \u2026<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">\u201cFor what purpose does Mr. Jordan seek recognition.\u201d \u2014 favorite Schiff quote so far, so meta <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/ImpeachmentInquiry?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#ImpeachmentInquiry<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/FuckYouJimJordan?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#FuckYouJimJordan<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Jordan Coburn (@jordansconfused) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/jordansconfused\/status\/1194640723322163201?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>I envisioned that, given Jordan&#8217;s highly excitable nature and athletic background, he might snap and then we&#8217;d see this next \u2026<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestler_v_Schiff.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-38202\" src=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestler_v_Schiff.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"370\" height=\"235\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestler_v_Schiff.jpg 370w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestler_v_Schiff-300x191.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestler_v_Schiff-150x95.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 370px) 100vw, 370px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>And it was clear that it wasn&#8217;t all that appealing to Ambassador Taylor or Mr. Kent. But being true diplomats, they handled it extremely well. But if there were <em>Thought Balloons<\/em> above their heads, you know it&#8217;d be something like this:<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">As I testified, Mr. Jordan = Bitch, did I stutter?<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; The Volatile Mermaid (@OhNoSheTwitnt) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/OhNoSheTwitnt\/status\/1194709953023373312?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>And there were numerous Tweets addressing Jordan&#8217;s hypocrisy concerning his never reporting any of the molestations of his wrestlers he was mad aware of while an assistant coach at Ohio State.<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Mr. Jordan was promoted to the Intelligence Committee because he&#39;s an expert on looking the other way when crimes are committed.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Carlos Garcia (@CarGar94) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/CarGar94\/status\/1194704392345120768?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">Mr. Jordan <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/hashtag\/TrumpImpeachment?src=hash&amp;ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">#TrumpImpeachment<\/a> <a href=\"https:\/\/t.co\/7NFfpJJ75N\">pic.twitter.com\/7NFfpJJ75N<\/a><\/p>\n<p>&mdash; Laura Sesana (@lasesana) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/lasesana\/status\/1194698785437503488?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<blockquote class=\"twitter-tweet\" data-width=\"550\" data-dnt=\"true\">\n<p lang=\"en\" dir=\"ltr\">If only Mr. Jordan was this excited about protecting young men from being molested.<\/p>\n<p>&mdash; SeanKentComedy (@seankent) <a href=\"https:\/\/twitter.com\/seankent\/status\/1194706721933017090?ref_src=twsrc%5Etfw\">November 13, 2019<\/a><\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><script async src=\"https:\/\/platform.twitter.com\/widgets.js\" charset=\"utf-8\"><\/script><\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p>In fact I personally was hoping someone would park Jordan&#8217;s &#8220;Mobile Clinic&#8221; van in front of the Capitol during the hearings<\/p>\n<p><a href=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestling_Mobile-Clinic_Free-Candy.jpg\"><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" class=\"alignnone size-full wp-image-38203\" src=\"https:\/\/www.7thstep.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestling_Mobile-Clinic_Free-Candy.jpg\" alt=\"\" width=\"507\" height=\"279\" srcset=\"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestling_Mobile-Clinic_Free-Candy.jpg 507w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestling_Mobile-Clinic_Free-Candy-300x165.jpg 300w, https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2019\/11\/Jim-Jordan_Wrestling_Mobile-Clinic_Free-Candy-150x83.jpg 150w\" sizes=\"auto, (max-width: 507px) 100vw, 507px\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>Maybe next week \u2026<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>[Editor&#8217;s Note: At least it&#8217;s still Friday.\u00a0 The Impeachment Hearings are just to riveting for me to resist, but take a chunk of time.\u00a0 I think Speaker Pelosi timed this extremely well, and Chairman Schiff is doing a stellar job.] Apparently the Rethuglicans were worried that Devin Nunes, ranking member of the House Intelligence Committee <a href='https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/2019\/11\/15\/friday-fun-courtesy-of-the-nunes-jordan-comedy-team\/' class='excerpt-more'>[&#8230;]<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":6,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-38200","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-politics","category-5-id","post-seq-1","post-parity-odd","meta-position-corners","fix"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38200","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/6"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=38200"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/38200\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=38200"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=38200"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.politicsplus.org\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=38200"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}