SoINeedAName

Apr 212017
 

Well, I’m going to accost you with my lamentations – because this has NOT been a particularly fun week.

It started out fine with taking my pseudo-aunt (my aunt’s sister) to the Kansas City Zoo.  She uses a walker, but we went last year in April and had a great time.  We only got about half the Zoo visited last year, so we did the other half this Monday.

On leaving my VSA (Vehicle Stability Assist) warning light came on and stayed on.  It does that when you spin tires on ice – but goes out once everything is back to normal – and it was a gorgeous spring day  So I pulled off the road and read Owner’s Manual.  It said turn off the engine and then restart the car – if it lights up again, take it in for a service.

NO LIGHT – YIPPEE!

But then not 30 seconds later, the Engine Malfunctioning Indicator light came on – and stayed on.  (At least it wasn’t blinking, which means it needs immediate attention.)  So I called to get a service appointment – but since it wasn’t an emergency, they gave me Wednesday.

And by Wednesday, the light had gone out – but since I’m going to Illinois next week for Mom’s cardiology appointment, I decided to take it in.

It was $79 for the diagnostic test to learn it was some “computer glitch” – probably the best I could hope for.

BUT they also said from the diagnostics that my left rear wheel bearings were shot and needed immediate replacing!  That was $809 of ouch!

I will say my pseudo-aunt had heard something odd from the right rear last year on a trip that led to my replacing the right rear wheel bearings.  And on the trip to the Zoo on Monday said she hear something similar but fainter from the left rear.

Then yesterday when I went to mow the lawn, my Toro would not start.  So I had to rent one (hate asking the neighbors), and will take it into the shop today.  There goes another boatload of money, I’m sure.

GRRRR

So this will be very brief – and there’ll be none next week when I’m in Illinois.  (I’ll be taking my pseudo-aunt up, too, so she can visit her sister – my real aunt.)

Thought we could all learn a lesson in the difference between class (Thanks, Obama!) and crass (ahhhh … that’d be YOU, Twitler!).

As you probably know, Twitler invited Sarah Palin to dinner at the White House this week, and Palin brought along Ted Nugent & Kid Rock.  They decided to post a couple of photos with the Hillary portrait.  To contrast their demeanor, compare it to the respect Pres. Obama shows the Reagans.

Pres. Obama's official White House photographer, Pete Souza was ever so subtle, but effective, with his Instagram response:

Being respectful.

A post shared by Pete Souza (@petesouza) on

Now compare that to this …

This official White House photograph is being made available for publication by news organizations and/or for personal use printing by the subject(s) of the photograph. The photograph may not be manipulated in any way or used in materials, advertisements, products, or promotions that in any way suggest approval or endorsement of the President, the First Family, or the White House.

And to at least include a little fun, how about some feline critters demanding food service

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Apr 142017
 

Texas annually anticipates its springtime carpet of bluebonnets producing a Floral Photo Fantabula

But this year California is taking over the top floral spot with a Super Bloom rarely seen.

[NOTE: I created free-standing GIFs, so you can't stop it to view individual photos.  If you do click on it at a certain photo, it'll open in a new window that takes a while to load – but then reverts to slideshow mode.]

Thanks to the record-breaking, drought-ending drenching California experienced this past winter, its parched desert hills and valleys are awash in a technicolor Super Bloom – a phantasmagorical palette that has not been seen for years and years.

According to research ecologist, Cameron Barrows, seeds that have been dormant in the desert sands for 5, 10, or even 30 years are responding to the rains of winter, creating carpets of red, orange, yellow, and purple flowers that have drawn record crowds – and it’s easy to see why!

The U.S. Department of the Interior, which posted photos to their Facebook page, wrote:

"The Valley floor has endless expanses of yellows and purples from coreopsis, tidy tips and phacelia, with smaller patches of dozens of other species.  Not to be outdone, the Temblor Range is painted with swaths of wildflowers in oranges yellow and purple like something out of a storybook."

And amazingly the Super Bloom fields are so vast, they’re visible from space!

Senior environmental specialist Wendy Picht, notes that the poppy fields draw the largest crowds because they last the longest and are brighter than other area species, such as baby blue eyes, arroyo lupine, caterpillar phacelia, Canterbury bells, goldfields, cream cups, delphinium and blue dicks (I’m NOT kidding, that’s what their name is – you can Google it – the fact that it’s edible … Oh, never mind)

Let's take a closer look at some of these beauties …

But she pleads with all visitors to respect the environment and STAY ON THE TRAILS

Granted, it may be hard to not wander afield – but for those that follow, please do Stay On The Trails.  What do you think – did this gal stay on a trail for her selfie?

A woman uses a selfie stick to photograph herself in a massive spring wildflower bloom caused by a wet winter in Lake Elsinore, California, U.S., March 14, 2017. REUTERS/Lucy Nicholson

The Super Bloom show started in the deserts close to the Mexican border, and has worked its way north.  If you’re in the LA Metro – or want to travel – this site has a map of the best locations.  But better hurry – the show is coming to a close soon:

http://laist.com/2017/03/31/super_bloom_3_best.php

 

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Apr 072017
 

A few days late, but I just can’t resist a good April Fools’ Day prank – and Math & Computer Science professor Matthew Weathers of Biola University in California has honed his pranks to a fine art-form! 

He began about 7 years ago using a Halloween prank to liven up his lesson, but decided that they’re better suited as an April Fools’ Day joke.  And he has really become a master. 

The class starts as any typical college math class does.  (zzzzzzz)  And like most teachers, he frequently uses a video screen for a lesson.  But for Prof. Weathers, the screen morphs into his stage – and before you know it, things escalate rapidly when a twin “Professor” in the video starts interacting with the real one!

Sometimes he’s in front of the screen, and sometimes he goes “inside the screen” to “become” a part of the video itself.

Weathers explained that he uses Adobe Premiere along with Adobe After Effects to create the video skits.  And as one can imagine, he admits he spends a great deal of time practicing to ensure everything works perfectly to get the joke across.

"I practiced about 20 times to get the timing right."  And he admits he learned to add audio cues to the video because “that helped a lot" – especially when he’s behind the screen.

So let’s see him in action, noting that as the years went by he became more elaborate with his creative skits:

2014 – The Quickest Way to Buy a Book from Amazon

2015 – Getting Trigonometry Wrong

2016 – His Internet Connect Goes Haywire

2017 – His Video Screen Has an “Accident”

Not only has he been written up in Time magazine – but he’s even made a serious video demonstrating how he MAKES his videos.

You can view all his videos here:

https://www.youtube.com/user/MDWeathers

It almost makes you wish you were back in a college math class with a professor this fun … ALMOST!

 

 

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Mar 312017
 

Does it really take a Village, People, to troll Kellyanne Conway?

Apparently not – as one guy got it done all by himself.  But more on that in a little bit.  Let’s start with what I think makes for a great Trump Theme Song – sung to the Village People’s anthem of “YMCA”.

I’m including the lyrics below – but a HEADS-UP … the lyrics are NSFW [NOT Safe for Work]!

 

White men,

Here's how it's going down.

All the black men,

We'll shoot them into the ground.

 

Mexicans,

This is not your hometown,

We're gonna build a wall 'round the country.

Barrack,

It's time to clear your shit out.

 

Hey Muslims,

Take the first flight out.

Yo Putin,

You're my BFF now.

Together we can nuke

Any country

Bomb, bomb, bomb, bomb

 

That's how it's gonna be in

Trump's USA!

I have successfully,

Fucked USA-A!

 

We have no gun control,

So you men can enjoy,

Just don't make out with,

Any boys…

 

Hillary,

You can suck my cock,

I didn't mean that,

It was just locker room talk

 

So ladies…

Don't be too shocked

If I grab you

By the pussy.

 

(I actually said that)

 

That's how it's going to be in

Trump's USA!

 

Of course, Kellyanne Conway has made herself an easy target for trolling between her “alternative facts” and “spying microwaves” – but Alfredo Pelicci (an attorney in Washington) deserves a medal for a great one.

A couple of weeks back I came across this Tweet that was all the rage about Alfredo approaching Conway at the Lupo Verde restaurant in Washington and asking for a selfie.  [NOTE: Given my lack of hearing, their conversation was what I gleaned from reading comments about the Tweet.  So I’d appreciate your 2¢ on what you think they actually said.]

Conway agreed – but rather than the standard issue “Say: ‘Cheese’, Alfredo went with “Say: ‘I’m ruining America’ – in what was described as a cheerful voice. 

And when Conway demurs, saying “Are you happy?  You must feel really brave saying that”, Alfredo politely and cheerfully closes with “No?  Alright.  Thank you.”

Let’s close with a useful Schadenfreude tool to follow along on the (hopefully soon) demise of Twitler’s administration.  It’s a site that provides an INTERACTIVE Historical Tracking of Presidential Approval Ratings

You select the presidents you want to compare to Trump and duration of administration – it then graphs them out, but it does load a little slow.  Below is the current graph comparing everyone from Reagan on.  That red line way down at the bottom?  That’s Twitler.

ETA [Edited to Add]

Just saw two magazine covers that came out in the past 24 hours that are smile-inducing – so I'll slip them in.

First is from our beloved "The New Yorker" – Andy's home – titled "Broken Windows":

And the second is a very clever animation from "The Economist" – also following a golf theme that so aptly illustrates Twitler violating "The First Law of Holes": If you find yourself in one, STOP DIGGING!

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Mar 252017
 

Both for missing "Friday Fun" yesterday (the crown to "complement" the root canal seems to have gone OK, but a little sore yet) – and because I didn't want to wait until next Friday – here's just a single, very enjoyable Tweet with a great GIF clip to go with the caption that I  came across:

(Boy, do I miss them!  At least we got to enjoy them for 8 years!)

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Mar 172017
 

Did I actually put “republicans” and “fun” in the same sentence?  I know, I know – but to be honest, it’s actually other folks making FUN of republicans.  So we’re good.

The week’s festivities started with Paul Ryan giving his Trumpcare/WeDon’tCare PowerPoint presentation for AHCA – and folks had a field day with memes.  So let’s enjoy some of their handiwork

First, let’s admit that they tried to incorporate some good points into their AHCA plan …

And it does try to offer some sound advice …

And it is elegant in its underlying simplicity at cutting costs …

But surprisingly enough, Paul Ryan actually gave an honest summation of the GOP’s AHCA plan – he concluded that it’s a …

Then Kellyanne Conway stepped up to TRY to “help” out Twitler with his bald-faced lie that Pres. Obama had his “wires tapped”, by claiming Obama wasn’t just limited to spying only by having “wires tapped” … he could also be using a microwave oven camera.

Conway actually learned of the microwave’s sinister photographic powers from her own oven:

And the sad duty of informing Pres. Obama of Conway’s odd, but extremely serious, charge of ordering microwaves to become a Snapchat spy on Twitler fell to Hillary.  Fortunately, she was up to the task:

But in all fairness, if you take a closer look at your microwave’s Control Panel, you can see there’s some possibility to Conway’s claim

But being skeptical, I decided to go right to the source and ask MY microwave if it was spying on me – and this is the reply I got from my oven:

So maybe Obama HAS been infiltrating Trump Tower …

  

I’ll leave you with this sobering clip.  Wanting to be thorough, I setup one of those “Nanny Video Cams” that record exactly what does go on in the kitchen when I’m not around.  To say the least, I was flabbergasted!

So who knows – maybe Conway was correct.

Nah – not a chance in hell.  I was just toying with you.

 

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